The Cake Not Eaten

I’ve been low on sleep lately and I cannot tell you how hard it is to write a review of something when you’re sleep-deprived, so have another parody poem I wrote.


Two cakes displayed in a grocery store,
And sorry I could not consume both
To be that gluttonous, eating more
Until I could not fit through the door
Due to my enormous sideways growth.

Then on to other stores with more cake,
And perhaps some fancy cupcakes too,
Because I am hungry and hate to bake;
Though this gives me a bellyache
I promise that I will carry through.

All cakes this morning equally lay
In peace, awaiting consumption.
Oh, sweet undisturbed splendorous display!
Yet knowing how I should spend my day
I doubted I could have the presumption.

I am telling this tale with a sigh,
My morose voice falling quiet:
Two cakes displayed in a store, and I—
I did, neither cake, choose to buy,
And I, instead, stuck with my diet.

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