In an all-too frequent turn of events, I wound up spending a couple minutes trying to scrub soap off my hands. The automated soap dispenser in the bathroom at work, which usually dispenses too little soap, dumped more than twice as much soap as usual on my hands. After scrubbing them clean and going to rinse them off in the sink, I had to move my hands away from the spigot, wait a couple seconds, and move them back under the spigot a total of four times in order to get all the soap off my hands. You see, for whatever reason, the company I work for decided that THESE bathrooms, in this part of the building built specifically for said company, would have water-saving automatic faucets that not only turned themselves off if there wasn’t enough of your hands DIRECTLY in front of the sensor, but would also turn off if the water was running for ten consecutive seconds AND then refrain from turning on until you moved your hands away, waited a couple seconds, and moved them back in front of the sensor. You have to let the sensor deactivate and only then can you reactive it. Ostensibly, this is a water saving measure that works to compliment the low-volume faucet (that mixes in a bunch of air to make the little bit of water you’re getting look more voluminous than it is) so that it either doesn’t get stuck on or encourages people to not keep the water running when they’re not actively rinsing their hands. However, as an owner of a large pair of hands with a very clear conception of what it takes to actually clean your hands after using the bathroom, I find it incredibly frustrating to be in need of more water so often.

Supposedly, features like this exist on automatic faucets to help reduce water waste. Depending on your company or your geographic location, these savings might be intended to reduce the company’s water bills or to conserve water. As someone living in a water-rich part of the country, I can still appreciate an attempt to not waste water, but I have to admit that I’m pretty sure I’d let less water run if I could get just a little more volume for just a little longer than this faucet will let me have in one go. I’m really not sure what my employer thinks they’re saving by having these low-flow faucets. It’s certainly not saving me any amount of time and might be spending more water, especially given that it can take me up to six tries to actually get all the soap off my hands (one water activation and then five reactivations is my personal record for most-bothersome hand washing). Between the extra electricity, the initial cost, and the fact that they’re paying me to spend about an extra minute at the sink, I think this probably costs them more than they’re saving. Also, it’s not like I’m having a good time washing my hands. It’s frustrating to have to either perfectly balance not keeping my hands in front of the sensor so long that it deactivates or to constantly need to move my hands away multiple times before they’re fully soap free. It’s not like I’m just going to dry my still-soapy hands like so many of my coworkers will. I actually want to keep my hands from drying out.

An extra layer of frustration on top of this is all the signs that are in the bathroom now. I don’t blame them for keeping them up four years after the pandemic started. After all, I’ve seem way too many people leave the bathroom without washing their hands at all, which is disgusting. And it’s not even just the whole “I used a urinal so I don’t need to wash my hands” thing. I’ve seen people leave stalls and walk right out the door (this is why I refuse to touch any surface in the building other than ones I’ve recently cleaned without immediately washing my hands afterwards), which is one of the most disgusting things I’ve seen an adult do in a workplace. The main issue I take with the signs, despite (or perhaps because) of the apparent need for them, is that they’re all set up in stalls or above urinals. Every single sign that asks if you’ve washed your hands is literally only visible while you’re using one of the various toilets. Every bathroom I’ve been in is set up the same way. Near the sinks, there are signs about proper hand-washing procedure–a mix of instruction signs outlining the steps in the process and some using images to show what actions you should be taking while lathering your hands and singing their suggested song–but nothing near the doors that asks if you’ve washed your hands. If you’re the sort to ignore the sinks on your way out of the bathroom, there is absolutely no sign placed to remind you what a disgusting creature you are, which makes all of the other ones asking if you’ve washed your hands feel like a huge waste.

Sometimes, I wish it were acceptable to publicly shame people for not washing their hands after using the bathroom. This is basic sanitation stuff and, given that we share breakrooms, water coolers, soda fountains, and coffee stations, absolutely disgusting. Sure, none of the people working in that building are food service employees, but the idea that the button I’m pressing to dispense water might have been touched by someone who left the bathroom without washing their hands is disgusting enough that I hate refilling my water bottle. If public workplace shaming were allowed for matters of communally reprehensible behaviors like not washing your hands after using the bathroom, I’d have half a dozen people whose names I’d need to find out so I could spread the message of their disgusting behavior. At least half a dozen. I mean, sure, it can be a pain in the butt if you need to basically do the hokey-pokey to get your hands fully rinsed off in the bathrooms, but that’s still no excuse for not actually washing you hands. Ugh. I genuinely wish I could believe that other people put some thought into this kind of stuff, but the fact that I’m here complaining about any of it feels like pretty damning proof that almost no one thought about any of this before building the bathrooms or putting up the signs….