After months of constant heat and too-warm mornings, we’ve finally had some days with lower temperatures. Heck, it even dropped into the low fifties overnight, just recently. We’re finally back in the range of what I’d expect for mild Summer weather and I’m only slightly worried that it’s happening in late August rather than September when I’d start to expect days like this [of course, this week, it’s already going back to temperatures in the mid-to-high 70s]. It’s nice, though. To be able to enjoy the breeze without tons of wildfire smoke, to be able to exist outside without sweating, to be able to bask in the warm sun while the cool breeze blows past… I’ve been missing weather like this for a long time. We used to see it more, but now we tend to leap past it, either because Winter ran long and Spring catapulted instantly into Summer or because Summer arrived early and ate what little Spring we might have hoped for, so I’m trying to enjoy it while I can. Not by opening my windows, of course. That would be a disaster for my allergies right now… I’m just trying to get back into the habit of my daily walks now that it’s less punishing to even step foot outside. I’m hoping this weather will stick around for a while, and that it’ll lead into a nice, gentle Fall, but I’m not holding my breath. Nothing about the seasons has been “gentle” in years.

This has probably been my most indoors Summer ever. I’m not a huge fan of doing outside stuff constantly, but I’ve never really minded sweating and always enjoyed some good Summer heat, warm Summer rains, and the drone of distant cicadas as the heat roils just beyond the shade I’m sitting in. I’ve always tried to spend some time outside, hiking or walking or picnicking or simply sitting on my porch or whatever, but this year’s constant horrible exchange between high heat and humidity or terrible air quality have conspired to keep me inside. I’ve had enough sore throats and eye issues in the past four years that I’m not going to risk my health any more than I have by going out in the smoke. Plus, my antidepressants have made me sweat profusely and disgustingly any time I’m working hard or when I move around at anything other than a sedate pace, so I’ve had very little reason to go out and plenty of reason to stay inside, sitting still in what comfort my air conditioning can provide. This certainly hasn’t helped my depression any, but it’s not like I was choosing that. I was merely failing, constantly, to overcome the inertia all that stillness had instilled in me. Turns out that if the only benefit to going outside and soaking through a t-shirt on a normal walk or having to wear a mask the whole time to protect myself from the smoke is an abstract, indirect mitigation of my depression, I’m not going to be super inclined to go outside when there’s plenty I can do inside that will mitigate my depression just as much if not more.

Still, there’s been some nice rains, some cool days, and a few clear skies here or there that made it possible to enjoy things for a while. I’m just glad to see that we’re finally moving into a period of time where the temperature will start to go down enough that I can hopefully enjoy it more, before Fall fully arrives and Winter sweeps in on its heels. As much as I generally enjoy Winter, I like variation in my seasons and this whole “smoke or disgusting heat index BS” is not the kind of variety I appreciate. Give me some wild weather, a few wall-shaking storms, some cool sedate days, and plenty of languid hot ones. Let me soak up some sun so the last vesitiges of my tan from two years ago don’t fade entirely (I had to avoid even moderate sunlight last year since one of the medications I was taking meant that a UV Index of 3 would give me sunburn) while I go on my daily walks. Let me enjoy a Summer that’s as warm as it’s supposed to be so I can spend at least part of the year pretending climate change isn’t destroying my environment. Let me go back to entire Summers without the acrid smell of wildfire smoke wafting on the wind.

At this point, though, we’re probably past the worst of it. I don’t really expect any heat like we had for most of the late Spring and early to mid Summer. Night is arriving sooner, the sun is shifting northward in the sky, and I can actually enjoy having my windows open in my car while I wait for it to air out after baking in the sun all day. I have to contend with the frequent, awful smell of manure being spread in fields near me, but at least I can drive away from that in a way I can’t drive away from wildfire smoke or humidity. The nasty smell of local farms stays local and even disappears if the wind shifts the right way. Much nicer than the smell of smoke that will make it into my apartment if it’s thick enough outside. There’s no fields near my apartment, for one thing, so I can go sit on my balcony and enjoy a sunset as I wait for my dinner to finish cooking when farmers spreading manure is the only concern. Hopefully, as I get back to cooking more food and have the energy to do things again, I’ll be able to take advantage of the nicer weather without struggling as much to make myself actually go outside. Sure would be nice to have some good weather for a while, for once in the last few years…