One of the most important lessons I’ve learned over the years is that, sometimes, pushing yourself a little bit harder than you think you should, taking one more step after you decided you’ve given up for the day, or just convincing yourself that even just a little bit is better than nothing at all… All of that can make the difference between peace of mind and feeling like you’ve failed. I worked for twelve hours today [wrote this on a Wednesday, rather than my usual one-week-ahead, which really only matters to me since I worked 7.5 hours on the 31st and then 12 every work day since then]. I spent the entire thing running around, chasing down a problem, and trying to run herd on a group of people who were placed at my disposal to help figure something out. I ended the day barely on my feet at a quart to nine in the evening, so mentally and physically exhausted that I had to take a break between walking to my car and driving it to the restaurant where I’d made my takeout order. I was done. I had barely enough energy for a shower and to climb the stairs from my main floor to the second floor where I’d planned to eat my dinner at half past nine, watch a little anime, and then play video games until exhaustion overwhelmed me. I had done enough. Even I couldn’t have asked more of myself than I’d already done, because I not only did everything I expected to do, but everything that came up along the way.
Continue readingStorytelling
I Played So Many Tabletop Games Last Week
Last week was a pretty active week for me, in terms of tabletop gaming. Three of four possible games happened and I enjoyed each of them in incredibly different ways. While I’ll save my ruminations about my every-other-week game of Heart: The City Beneath for Friday, I have plenty to write about from the Elden Ring themed game of Dungeons and Dragons 5e I played last Thursday and the game of Pathfinder 2e I played two days later. As I’ve mentioned before, the Thursday game is one that has been going on for a while and meets at least somewhat regularly. I’m still fairly new to Pathfinder 2e and the group I play with every other Saturday, but I’ve been settling in well despite our scheduling issues and enjoying the somewhat more intense roleplaying that game provides compared to the encounter-heavy Dungeons and Dragons game I play. The two of them make for a lot of fun experiences since I’m very comfortable with D&D’s rules, so I can just relax and enjoy some silly combat stuff, and I’m always happy to do a bunch of roleplaying, so I’ve got a fairly easy environment in which to learn Pathfinder 2e a little better. I’ll admit that some of my knowledge gains in that game feel a little futile given that the remastered version of the game is coming out soon and I’ll have to unlearn and relearn a lot of stuff when that happens. Especially since some of that stuff is what I’ve been very focused on previously since my character, a rogue who dabbles in alchemy and tons of crafting, apparently lands in a lot of areas being reworked from one edition to the next.
Continue readingNational Novel Writing Month 2023
Today is the first day of National Novel Writing Month (Or NaNoWriMo as I’ll be calling it in the rest of the post) and I only just decided I was going to definitely participate yesterday (which, coincidentally, is the day I wrote this post). I’ve been thinking about it for a bit, but not as long as I usually do. Normally, there’s little else on my mind as summer finally begins to fade into fall, but this past year (since it has actually been a year of this life stress and chaos now, despite my desperate attempts to avoid it) has driven most things beyond the immediate day and sometimes week I’m experiencing so far from my mind that I’m beginning to forget what it is like to live any other way. So when my friend asked if I was planning to do NaNoWriMo, it caught me off guard since I did not have an answer prepared and I almost dismissed the question as being hardly relevant right then, despite it being the twenty-first of October, because I’d forgotten how soon the beginning of November was. Still, it’s not like I had to do much to prepare. I’m fairly adept at coming up with writing projects and while I expect to struggle with finding the time I need to do my daily writing since my schedule is already so full, I expect I’ll be able to find enough to write about to fill any words left over should I finish the last twenty-ish chapters of Infrared Isolation before I hit the required fifty thousand words for the month. I mean, the first twenty chapters are over seventy-five thousand words, so I’m really not worried, even if I wind up being a few chapters short of forty-six.
Continue readingTelling Human Stories In Heart: The City Beneath
I’ve now run two sessions of Heart: The City Beneath and I think I definitely picked the right game for this group. We’re moving at a glacial pace, compared to how the game is built to run, but that’s because we’re doing some pretty heavy roleplaying. We’re also still getting used to the game and I’m still introducing my players to the various systems and rules involved it, along with carefully setting expectations as we go, so I’m really not that worried about our pace. I’m making sure to separate the game’s mechanical concept of “a session” from the actual runtime and pacing of our gaming sessions since it would really undercut the utility of several moves and the pacing of the beat system if we completely abandoned our rate of play and strictly adhered to the period of time on specific days that we gathered to play the game. I mean, I had a powerful figure in the world give my characters “An Answer” as part of their payment for the tutorial mission (meant to help them all solidify their character’s goals and provide them with a bit of information they could use to kick off their character’s journey) and we spent almost half the session roleplaying through everyone’s answers. A quarter of the session went to talking about how the game worked and translating the things we were discussing into more concrete terms for the players and the last quarter was smaller bits of roleplaying and the final stages of the tutorial delve. We filled almost four hours in the blink of an eye and we were even down a player.
Continue readingSea Of Stars Was A Great Game With A Poor Ending
A quick disclaimer that, since I wrote about all but the very last bits of Sea of Stars already, this post is going to be rife with spoilers in probably every paragraph below this one (and especially rife in the paragraph immediately below this one)! It is impossible to discuss the things I want to without wading deeply into the various themes, plot beats, and even the final resolution of the game, so check out my first review if you just want to know whether or not you should play the game and then read this review if you don’t care about spoilers and want to know what I think about the game now that I’ve finished it. I will say that, regardless of what you might read below (and to give a pre-spoiler final conclusion on the game), I think you should play it. I had a blast and while I have a lot of thoughts about the story’s wrap up, it is still a point in the game’s favor that they put so much in the game that I have a burning desire to talk about it, even if I might not be as happy with the wrap-up as I would like to be. I put about thirty hours into the game and it was absolutely worth my money and that much of my time. I have no regrets about spending my time on it and I’ll probably even replay it eventually, using the New Game + mode to get the final achievements so I can rest easy knowing I did everything there was to do in the game. Now, with that said, on to my final and full review of the game!
Continue readingWe’re Finally Starting Heart: The City Beneath Next Session
We finally finished The Ground Itself. Our final ten showed up as our second draw and then, as we wrapped up the game, I moved us into talking about what our first session of Heart: The City Beneath would look like. I checked in with my players, asked about some thematic stuff, and then pushed us into talking about characters and how to tie all the excellent worldbuilding we’d done to the systems and nouns of Heart. While Heart was in our minds the whole time we played The Ground Itself, we were still using a bunch of the nouns that I’d come up with for the core worldbuilding proposal, not to mention the plethora of nouns we produced in our game, so we had to slowly work through the mechanics of Heart and lace the disparate elements together. It required some careful work, since we were also pushing through character creation at the same time, I had a hard out an hour before our session was typically done, and I had some other stuff going on that was distracting me, but we got through most of it. I’m sure there’s plenty more that will need to be done on the fly as we play, but that’s just part of the game. Can’t have it all built out beforehand or else we’re not leaving room for us to play the game!
Continue readingThe Purpose of Themes and Subgenre Tropes in Chained Echoes
This post will contain spoilers for the game Chained Echoes beginning in paragraph five (the very first sentence of the paragraph is a themaic spoiler and they only get more specific from there).
The older I get, the more I’m aware that everything is about something. Intentionally, unintentionally, and sometimes widely varying based on who is interpreting it. Sure, I learned this truth a long time ago, but it only ever seems to get more and more true as time goes on. I mean, I studied English Literature, always enjoyed reading comprehension tests or assignments in grade school, and though it took me a while to really grasp this idea in high school, I have been leaning into it ever since. This is not a new idea to me or even most people (I hope, though the state of the world makes me question how many people are capable of grasping nuance). I compleely set aside the idea that we aren’t constantly, and frequently unintentionally, showing whatever is on our minds through what we created the time I realized that the story I was writing in high school was about me and the horrible family life I had. Once I saw that, I couldn’t unsee it. Even when I redid the story in my last year of college and tried to be more intentional about what the story was about, I still found myself uncovered interpretations and metaphors I hadn’t intentionally written into it. This is why I tend to rewrite rather than revise these days, since it helps me figure out if the underlying issue is actually a part of the story or just something that was weighing heavily on my mind while I was writing. I don’t mind this stuff showing up in my writing, though, since I’m a firm believer in needing to write things out so I can learn what I’m thinking, but I generally try to be aware of it.
Continue readingGoing Off The Rails After Adding Trains
I genuinely did not think that I’d ever look at a game of The Ground Itself that I’m using as a means of doing collaborative worldbuilding for a different game and think “this has clearly gone off the rails,” but that’s what I’ve found myself doing as I review the notes from my Sunday group’s latest session. This isn’t necessarily a bad thing, mind you, just something that has gone far beyond all of my expectations about what we’d accomplish in a session or two (which will soon be three since we once again ran out of time without finishing our game). We’ve wound up more focused on individuals and their places in the area than the game is designed to be, but we’ve also gone from slowly developing an area over time to wildly inventing things. It’s honestly a great energy, even if I worry that we’ve lost the plot a bit. I’ll be able to weave it all into the world we’ve going to play in when we finally get to Heart: The City Beneath, but there’s just so much stuff happening and so many vague characters introduced that I’m not sure how I’m going to be able to include it all in any kind of interesting and meaningful way.
Continue readingBurying Heart: The City Beneath Within The Ground Itself
I wound up going another session of my every-other-week Heart: The City Beneath campaign without playing Heart. We’re still in the throes of The Ground Itself and I regret nothing. I’m having a great time. Almost all of my players just so deeply understand what we’re doing that they’ve done half the moves I’d planned for myself, in terms of setting up the horrors of the world we’re going to play in. This means I’ve been able to focus on specifics and painting good images during my turns rather than introducing aspects of the world at large or adding to the tension of this downright awful bit of geography. I get to do things like talk, in detail, about a mysterious creature that emerged from a horrible sinkhole, described in stories as but a shadow on the horizon, that now wanders this world on some sort of mission that only it knows. Or describe how the dominant species (a froglike non-sentient creature that is incredibly long, flat, and known for hunting down everything in the area, including the people who used to live there) has been impacted by the force of decay called The Rot (which decays anything it touches/infests in every dimension and way, rather than being bound strictly to biological materials like we’re familiar with in meatspace) and how some of them have mushed together to form some kind of horrible beast that has been disappearing people for an unknown number of years. Or how a train, riding rails of limestone, bone, and metal over slowly dessicating dirt, emerged from the same pit that every horror has left behind in order to discorge its unknowable passengers upon the surface. It has been an absolute delight to play this game, even if it is, somewhat predictably, taking an incredibly long time to play.
Continue readingToday Marks Two Years of Updates
Today, when this blog post goes up, is the two-year anniversary of my return to updating this blog on a regular basis. The day I wrote this is the two-year anniversary of my return to writing regular blog posts. I started this period of blogging with a one-week buffer and, with a couple small exceptions, have maintained this lead-time ever since. I am incredibly proud of the work I’ve done over these past two years, the growth I’ve made as a writer (since this project and the one-week buffer was intended to give me a means to practice editing my own work and to improve my drafting abilities), and the discipline I’ve shown by sticking to it as much as possible without damaging my health or well-being. Turns out it is more difficult for me to do something on a limited scale than it is for me to do something more extreme. Updating this blog every day for over a year, like I did when I first started out, was mentally easy. I just had to do a thing every day. It became a daily habit, just like brushing your teeth or showering. Doing this five days a week with a single weekend update if I can manage it is much more difficult, since I actually need to plan my time out. After all, it’s easy to take a day off if you’ve got a buffer before you run out of blog posts. It takes way more work to keep the buffer in place.
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